My Favorite Christmas Gift

December is always a hard month for me. My mom's birthday is December 13 and I tend to miss her the most around Christmas. Even though this is my sixth Christmas without her, it's still hard and still feels a little empty without her. That's why this year's present from my sister was so special and by far my favorite.

My sister, Jill, went home a lot this past spring and was able to go through some boxes and found a lot of things that were my mom's. She found a tape that my mom had made a few months before she died that she narrated about her life and some of her favorite things about her children. Jill put that on a cd for me, along with some fun pictures of my mom as a child, teenager, and adult. She also found a letter my mom wrote to me a few weeks before she had my sister, as I was not going to be the only child anymore. I don't think I had ever read it before. I started to cry as soon as I opened it, recognizing right away that it was my mom's handwriting. Jill also gave me a print of a picture she took for a project in one of her photo classes in college. She took different pictures of my mom and projected them on different places around our house. This one was of my mom and her mom outside their house in Indonesia (my mom grew up in Southeast Asia and spoke Indonesian as her first language) projected on the front door of our house. It was my favorite of the project and have been begging for a copy since I saw it this spring. It was such a nice surprise to have a little bit of my mom for Christmas and to hear her voice again. Thank you Jill for the best Christmas present this year!

The Nutcracker

It just isn't Christmas to me without seeing the Nutcracker. My mom took me several times when I was younger and was even fortunate enough to see the Pacific Northwest Ballet perform it in Seattle with my aunt. (We sat close enough that you could see the sweat flying off the dancers as they spun. Kind of gross, but I loved it.) My mom loved classical music and had it playing at home quite frequently, pretending she was the conductor. This meant that the Nutcracker was her music of choice during the holidays. I love everything about the Nutcracker, the music, the dancing, the costumes... That being said, I was so excited at my ultrasound with Megan when I found out she was a girl. My first thought was, "Oh yay! My own little girl to take to the Nutcracker with me!". I have made Eric go with me more times than he would have preferred. Last year I went with a friend and her roommates, as Eric informed me that he would no longer be attending with me. Megan really loves dancing and music, so I was brave and decided to take my not-quite 3 year-old to the ballet. I love the Ballet West production at the Capitol Theater in Salt Lake, but was a little nervous that Megan might not make it through the whole performance, so I went with my sister-in-law and her two girls to a regional performance in Sandy. It was a lot cheaper and wouldn't make me angry if we had to leave. All three girls did great, despite it being during nap-time, and Megan really enjoyed it. Next year we are going to Ballet West for sure!